The New Year

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Christmas is over for another year

and as it goes it drains me of all my cheer

Regardless of your religion I hope you got to be with the ones you love

And found solace in whatever you believe is above

We go into the new year with the world in distress

The minority hurting the majority and making a mess

Mother nature is crying but no one hears

Because some bloody mongrels are shouting out bad ideas

Ignore these monsters

We can block them out by standing together

Forgetting our differences

and just loving each other

It is in mankind’s nature to only think of its self

Hence why the earth is disintegrating into hell

plant a tree and get to know your neighbour

recycle as much as you can and never renege on a favour

We’ve all got problems

but this world is in serious decline

I want there to be a happy healthy world in which my children can grow

Not this dark and decaying one that is starting to show

kisses

I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and you got be be with the people you love. I was lucky enough to get to be with most of the people I hold dear.

Now I’m going to have some time away from the internet; bar Facebook and Instagram, as I don’t want to give up seeing everybody hanging out taking happy snaps and enjoying time with family :-).

I’ll be back on the 8th of January with a release day sneak peek for a lovely lady and her paranormal detective series. I’ll return to my regular posting schedule on the 17th with my first Bookish Babble of 2016. I’ll see you then.

Extinction: Friday Fictioneers 100 Word Story Challenge

I knew it was pointless, that I would be too late. But I had to see it for myself.

The door popped open and my nostrils were assaulted with the foul stench of decay.

I gingerly stepped outside, my eyes taking in nothing but burnt land and smoldering Furly-Pon skeletons.

They had been a peaceful race and never stood a chance against us.

If my engines hadn’t failed I would have got here sooner and been able to save at least a few of them.

Another world conquered. Another race wiped out.

Well done humans, when will it be enough?

Friday Fictioneers is a weekly challenge set by Rochelle Fields where writers around the world create 100 word stories inspired by the one image.

This week’s PHOTO PROMPT © Douglas M. MacIlroypleisiosaur_

For more information CLICK HERE to see Rochelle’s website

Or CLICK HERE to view the other Friday Fictioneers stories for this week.

Potions, Pills and Nightmare Chills OH MY!

  • I’ve been trying so hard to go pain killer free, but my body continues to argue with me about it. Pain radiates from my lower back into the base of my skull and I can’t handle it anymore. I’ve got an appointment with a Physio, so we’ll see what they say. I figured I should try and get back into yoga to stretch and strengthen my back. I had been going really well, off my Antidepressants and off painkillers, using only natural remedies. But earlier his week the darkness returned with the loss of our beloved Buster and set me back a bit. Interestingly enough the return of the darkness has coincided with my back flaring up again – hmmm linked much!

    On Monday I had a really bad day; I felt absolutely useless, was in physical pain and spent most of the day crying or screaming at my husband. I had a horrible nightmare about my son dying the night before and it just shut me down. I had never felt true fear until I became a mother! My f*#ked up brain always takes me ‘there’, when I get the slightest bit down and then I feel the need to smother Riley with kisses. But I love my brain anyway; I wouldn’t be me without it.

    I have been keeping up my essential oil routine of; Young Living “Joy” Essential Oil blend rubbed on my wrists in the morning and Young Living “Peace & Calming” Essential Oil blend rubbed on my writs at bed time along with Lavender on my temples and Progressence Phyto Plus on my feet.

    I’ve also been taking quality supplements; a Multi Vitamin, Zinc, B2 in the morning and Magnesium at night before bed. I’ve have been sleeping better than I can ever remember. I’ve felt more alert and clear headed than I ever did on antidepressants. It’s only been this week that things have taken a turn, but I’m positive I can get on track, fix the physical issues and continue on with my journey to good overall health.

    I recently read that Yoga means “Union” and as we all know it is supposed to bring the body, mind and spirit back into alignment. Sounds good huh? I’d love to get my shit together and be one with myself. I am definitely getting there; I’m much closer to feeling whole than I was a year and half ago, when I was at my worst. A Yoga Centre opened up a little while ago in the old library of my town. I was thinking it was a sign that I should get back into yoga (as well as my back being a little bitch). I haven’t been to a class or done any poses since before I was pregnant with Riley.

    So back to the Yoga Union thing: Well, I’ve always been down with My Spirit, I love that girl. My Mind and I have had a rough relationship. It took me 27 years to love her, she caused my all sorts of pain until I could except and love her for who she is. We’ve been sweet for the past six months and it’s been really nice. But My Body, that bitch is causing me all sorts of pain at the moment. From about the age of eight I’ve hated her. Having my son forced me to appreciate and respect her. I am thankful for and love the things she’s given me, but not her – but I am working on that.

    I have come to truly love the ‘me’ within and I am looking forward to the day I can love the outside ‘me’ and we can all salute the sun together.

My First Ever YouTube Video

The greatest prison people live in is the fear of what other people think.

With that in mind, I am going to suck it up and just post this video!

Arms Around Me

I want to run and hide
Down deep inside
How happy I would be
You no longer poisoning my mind
Please set my soul free
I’d no longer need to lie
Without your arms around me
But I’m frozen in pain
Shame won’t let me leave
The failure I’ve become
Is unbecoming to me
You no longer by my side
I’d set my soul free
But with you till I die
I told you I would be
So here still I lie
With your arms around me
I feel the need to cry
But the tears won’t leave me
While you wallow in sorrow and self-pity
Why don’t you just leave me?
All the past tears we’ve cried
With your arms around me
I’m trying to figure out why
And if I should leave
But with you till I die
I told you I would be
So here still I lie
With your arms around me

Devils Juice

(No this poem is not about me, It’s merely an observation!)

Decided on drinking rum

For as long as the bottle lasts

Regretting the decision

Fills up the next day

Head aching so hard

That all other thoughts gone away

Replaying the night over

Fragments are missing

My memory betrays me

How did I get these cuts on my feet

Oh the back door is broken

And now there is blood on the sheets

My tongue feels like sandpaper

And there is vomit on my shirt

God I wish the room would stop spinning

And my head didn’t hurt

I swear I’ll never touch that devils juice again

Oh who am I kidding

I am lying

And I am ashamed

Tonight I will do it all again

The world is too dark

And I’m afraid

It is too dark to be sober

So I will stay drunk and brave

Cover Forest DKFeatured in my upcoming collection – The World Around Me

Out Now is >>>
SmashCover

https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/423080

Be Free

She sits alone in the dark

Afraid to light her torch

For fear of what she might see

She can hear the creatures crawling

How close they must be

The darkness in her mind all consuming

The beasts won’t let her be reprieved

Then someone steps up with their torches blazing

Attempting to help her be free

The light from their glow is rather daunting

She’s not sure if she can leave

She sees her surroundings

The stranger’s presence commanding

As he turns and starts to lead

She follows faithfully

And they find a better and brighter way to be

The stranger a stranger no more

He helped her find the strength to leave

Cover Forest DK

 

 

This Poem is out of my in progress collection “The World Around Me” that will, fingers crossed, be published soon.

SmashCover

 

 

 

My First Collection “My Mind The Menace” was published late last month. YAY! accomplished.

Check it out – If you Dare!

https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/423080

 

Nightmares

I missed yesterday’s 365 post; its theme was “nightmares”. I’ve got two big ones that I thought I’d share anyway. Maybe if I write them out as I remember them, I might be able to forget them.

Since having my son I’ve had two Riley (my son) related nightmares that really freaked me out, enough that my husband had to wake me up because I was screaming in my sleep, enough that parts of them stuck in my head once I was fully awake and enough that I can’t forget them or the way they made me feel.

Werewolf Outbreak; the first dream I’m going to writing about. It happened when my son was still a newborn and It was like being stuck in a horror movie.  I can remember running from my husband carrying my newborn baby as had been bitten and was turning into a werewolf. My mother was killed, half eaten; it really fucks you up seeing your mother like that, even if it is imaginary. I found my dad and we were running. We returned to his house to get supplies. I can remember him telling me to hide in roof and being terrified! I was hiding in the roof trying to keep a newborn quiet as a werewolf smashed through the house and killed my father. I can remember being stuck up in the roof and realising my son was so quiet because he had died. That’s when my husband had to wake me up because I was screaming hysterically.

Yep! Pure horror movie shit. I don’t even think I’d been reading or watching anything at the time that could have triggered it. I lay awake the rest of the night horrified at my brains ability to scare the fuck out of me.

Where is the car; the second dream I’m going to write about is one I had last week, it’s all fragmented, almost like still images. Before I tell you about this dream that haunted me for days after and still horrifies and baffles me I’d like to note – I have never left a small child or animal in a car and I never will intentionally – but I always forget where I parked my car.

So I’m running late to a wedding. I can’t find a car park. I dump my car and run to the church. On the outside the church looks small. There’s a man standing the door I give my apologies for being late. I realise my sons not with me. I’ve left my baby boy in the car. I Panic. I Run and Run and Run. I can’t find my car. I can’t remember where I parked my car. I run back to the church and go inside to ask for help. Inside the church is massive, with rows and rows of people.  I’m ignored. I run searching, screaming for my car, willing it to be found. I see my car. My car is empty. I run back to the church. The weddings over. A nun is holding a dead baby. It’s my son.

Days and days I couldn’t get the images out of my head – WHY does my brain to this to me!! WHY!!

I’ve even tried to rationalise this dream. I’ve got two cousins getting married soon, so that’s where the wedding would have come from. Obviously like any parent it terrifies me to think of something bad every happening to my son. Maybe I’m afraid with so much going on at the moment that I could get so distracted and accidently leave my son in the car, I don’t even want to think about that. Normally I forget he’s not with me, I turn around to talk to him and he’s not there. AHHHHHHHHH Nightmares, yep and you can guess I was screaming with this dream to.